the super happy pee explosion
thank you, little Asian girl, for taking the time to pee on the floor in the lobby of my workplace.
just a few hours earlier i was thinking, man! what a beautiful day.
i'd love to mop up a small golden puddle of fresh urine.
oops, watch your sandals ma'am... that's urine.
and your mother, who knew full well what you were doing, when i looked up at her and she smiled at me, that just made my day. really.
i'm glad you have a parent who allows you the freedom to spray piss wherever and whenever you feel like it.
i didn't have those opportunitites as a child; my parents would keep me in one of those little 'harnesses with the leash' deals when we went to public places.
but you, you're one happy little girl.
it's always superhappy-fun-pee-time for you!
your mommy was even nice enough to laugh at me on her way out.
hahaha. bye now. haha.
i need a fucking raise in salary.
and a Swiffer.
and maybe an assistant.
just a few hours earlier i was thinking, man! what a beautiful day.
i'd love to mop up a small golden puddle of fresh urine.
oops, watch your sandals ma'am... that's urine.
and your mother, who knew full well what you were doing, when i looked up at her and she smiled at me, that just made my day. really.
i'm glad you have a parent who allows you the freedom to spray piss wherever and whenever you feel like it.
i didn't have those opportunitites as a child; my parents would keep me in one of those little 'harnesses with the leash' deals when we went to public places.
but you, you're one happy little girl.
it's always superhappy-fun-pee-time for you!
your mommy was even nice enough to laugh at me on her way out.
hahaha. bye now. haha.
i need a fucking raise in salary.
and a Swiffer.
and maybe an assistant.
posted by mike | 12:27 PM
4 Comments:
You should have pissed on her mother...or followed her out and pissed on/in her car
You should have pissed on a lot of stuff:
your hands,
a pack of exportA greens,
a turkey sandwich,
the cash register,
some broken glass,
a helix album (maybe, Heavy Metal Love),
a copy of "barely legal"...
you know, stuff like that.
once as a teen i pissed on a copy of Triumph's "Progressions of Power" album. it was all i could do to quell the righteous and volcanic Flames of Riffage that spewed forth.
Goddamn! I like your style!
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