more crappy TV shows that'll never exist!

Welcome Back, Potter
-- the story of an aging, magical man-child who returns to his former High School of Wizardry to become a teacher to a bunch of 1970's looking slacker wizards-in-training. can he help them pass finals? will the Spellhogs show up and ruin Mr. Potter's anniversary plans with his wife in an hilarious manner? will they all learn the true meaning of Lincoln's Birthday? find out this season.

Private Danza
-- the story of an ex-boxer/taxi driver/baseball player/housekeeper who has become a singing private detective. no one will ever watch this.

Who Want's To Marry A Dog?
-- eight dogs live in a swanky hotel on a secluded tropical island. one of them is a millionaire. it's up to one of fifteen cocaine-deluded supermodels to try and figure out which dog gots the riches and marry him. who will win a life of freaky canine luxury? and who will be rummaging for scraps in the meat dumpster behind an unlicenced Mexican butcher shop? tune in and see.